Atime2write - Fiona Tarr

Living A Creative Life

When What you are Doing isn’t Working!

Stop doing it……

It sounds pretty simple, too simple really but it can make all the difference.

We have a family that live near us. I really wish I could help them out. They have a domestic almost daily, loud enough for the whole neighbourhood to hear. If it isn’t the father and daughter it is the wife and husband yelling at each other, swearing, cursing and screaming. I say I wish I could help them because I am old enough and wise enough to know that only they can help themselves and only if they really want to.

What they are doing is obviously not working, but they keep doing it…..Day after day after month after year….

Are you doing something that isn’t working in your relationships, your work life, your social life? Is it time to stop doing it?

How to Manage Change…

Changing something you have been doing for a long time takes courage, determination and commitment. All of these words can strike fear into our hearts but what are the alternatives? More of the same? To successfully make changes that will stick you can ask yourself these questions.

  • Am I ready for change? – This is a serious question. If you are not ready, you will not be determined and change won’t be lasting. Take time to answer this question carefully and don’t forget to ask this question of anyone your changes will effect. Change takes sacrifice, patience and hard work. Decide for yourself if the new life, love, job or experience will be worth it. To help you with this, try answering the next.
  • Can I see myself here for the next 20 years? Or even 10 years or 5 years? – I especially like this one when dealing with relationships and careers. Can you honestly sit back and say, I am loving where I am, I can see myself happy here for the next 20 years. If you can then there is no need for change, but if any part of where you are now isn’t going to float your boat for the rest of your life, then consider what changes, even little changes might be needed to get where you want to be.
  • What is the worst thing that can happen? – You really need to answer this question. It isn’t a little fun saying to get you over the line, it is serious. If you are leaving an abusive relationship, quitting your job or moving away from family then there will be consequences. So plan for them. Consider everyone who may be effected. Prepare the way so you can make a safe transition.

More of the Same…..

Change isn’t for everyone but if you are a driven and focussed individual wanting to make the most of every moment on this planet then chances are change is a given. That isn’t to say what you have been doing isn’t good, in many cases it has been great, but if more of the same is beginning to bore you, upset you or frustrate you then stop doing it…. but not before answering the three questions above.

I have made many changes in my life over the years. I left school early to work, I married a dairy farmer and moved away from my family, I have reinvented my career more than ten times, I have studied, volunteered and soul searched my way through life and there have been times when change was heartbreaking and other times when change has provided fabulous rewards both financial and personal.

Do you want to make a change? It is as good as a holiday they say? Whoever ‘they’ are?

I would love to hear about your next new thing…

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